i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
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