operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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