I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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