god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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