OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
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