But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
Randomize
