let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
Randomize
