I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
Randomize
