the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Randomize
