Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
