dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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