I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
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