Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Randomize