I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
Randomize
