Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
17 year olds will be the death of me.
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize