"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
You're breaking my sexual little heart
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
Randomize
