The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Randomize
