Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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