Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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