yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Randomize