Got a toothbrush?
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Randomize
