Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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