brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Rumble strips road head = magical
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
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