haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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