Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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