Is it normal to miss your booty call?
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
Randomize
