what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
Randomize
