Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Randomize
