I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
The guy in front of me in line at Starbucks looks kinda like Danica Patrick except he has a huge boner.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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