no, he came in my armpit
Do you have any cake mix? I kind of need to make a "im sorry i drank all your parents tequila, threw up all over your floor and slept with you boyfriend" cake.
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
Randomize
