A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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