Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
Randomize
