I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
