Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Randomize
