You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
I think I've given more of my business cards to Chipotle trying to win free burritos than anyone else
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
