Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
should my penis look like a turkey
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
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