A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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