And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
I skipped work to stalk him.
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
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