yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize
