Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
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