wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
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