Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize