Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
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