4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
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