sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
