Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
Randomize
