if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
