Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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