At least make sure they are 18
Why
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
Randomize
