If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Randomize
