Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
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