no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
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